Well hello thar time machine laydee, so nice of you to join us.
Gentle readers of the legacy meet Bailey Heart- the latest in a selection of time travelling kids who've joined the Heart family.
Bailey is the most recent addition to generation nine and she's the result of Addison Heart and her bessie mate Erin having a little too much fun in the time machine.
After making the long journey from the past Bailey arrived in the present day just as the rest of the family were busy celebrating birthdays, and all too soon it was time for her to join the gathering.
I wasn't too surprised when Bailey immediately started freaking out. I mean, it's an unusual situation to adjust to, and a certain amount of panic is to be expected.
Err, I meant panic for Bailey- not you guys.
Sigh! The glitchy aftershocks of human/Simbot hybrids continues in earnest.
By this point in my game the glitchyness was so bad it was, well, it was really pissing me off. Consequently I had to resort to any means necessary in order to fix things, and unfortunately for Rain this meant he had to move out.
He spazzed out all the way down the street, bless him.
With Rain gone some of the glitching problems did subside a bit, and finally Bailey was able to spend some time with her new mom.
Awwww.
Over the next few days Bailey settled into life in the 21st Century, eased into this transition by the bond she soon formed with her sisters Blue and Fox.
The three girls became best buddies as they spent all their time together either playing or doing their homework.
And Bailey wasn't the only one revelling in friendship- Chase's bond with childhood friend Gavin was still going strong.
But what of the oldest Gen 9 kid in the house? Well, I say kid but Thorn's a woman now. Well, a woman/machine. Anyways! Thorn's a proper laydee and as such it was time for her to get on with all sorts of grown up things, like getting a job and that. Except that she didn't want to. Lazy bum.
To be honest though the general glitchyness surrounding Simbots means that having a job would only be rather troublesome for Thorn, so instead she spent most days just chilling at home, pulling faces at me. Oh, but that's not all she did...
When Thorn and Rain were teens, despite their Simbotty credentials, they were somehow unable to eat scrap and do all other sorts of roboty things. But, with the transition into Young Adults came a whole host of marvellous new privileges, including my personal favourite...
An express desire to communicate with the microwave.
Oh my, I was howling with laughter at this point in my game.
You know I could have happily just spent all day following Thorn around the house and smiling at her sillyness, but in my heart I knew that it couldn't last forever, and so it was time for Thorn to get on with life.
I know how much youse guise love Thorn- probably about as much as I do, but y'see the thing is she can never be heir because she can't breed. Well, she could, but considering all the problems Simbot kiddies cause me I just can't be having it. However, that doesn't mean she can't still find true love!
And so it was time for a man hunt, but unfortunately on this first outing I made the fatal mistake of taking Addison along with. Addison's awesome I know, but she just radiates hotness and with her around no one else stood a chance of finding love, so instead the mother/daughter duo just took to the dancefloor.
Chase did alright though as he pursued an older lady (of the night).
The following day I decided to resort to more simplistic measures in the quest for Thorn's soul mate. Naturally if you're looking for hot man candy the first port of call just has to be the fire station right? So, that's where Thorn went.
Err, I'm considering throwing my 'How To Find Hot Men At The Fire Station' guide right out of the window.
But oh ho ho what do we have here then? Just when I thought all hope was lost along comes a little ray of sunshine to brighten up my day. Although, smexy dude here is actually a vampire so maybe he's more a little cloud of darkness than anything else.
Thorn soon jumped into getting to know our firey hot stud muffin here as she showed off her Simbot skills.
And it seemed Raichu was very impressed by it all.
Yes, Raichu. I can give him a ridiculous name if I want! Mm, I think I was feeling a bit cruel and unusual when I made this guy so I named him Raichu Nakamoto. I think it suits him.
As this was Thorn's first rush at romance she didn't want to mess it up, and so she spent a lot of time first building up a friendship with Raichu before she even thought about making a move.
Then, when the building blocks of their friendship were firmly cemented, Thorn invited herself round to Rai's house one day so she could MAKE THE MOVE.
Shit, I didn't mean to leave the Caps Lock on then, but I guess it adds a dramatic flair to proceedings- though perhaps more dramatic was Thorn's reaction to Raichu answering the door with his top off. Her circuits practically fried, the poor lamb.
Eventually Thorn pulled herself together enough to begin to woo Raichu- telling him how much she liked his floppy fringe and his shiny man-nipples, all leading into the dazzling moment when she would casually state that she knew the best place in town for them to get liquid coolant and would he like to join her for a cup?
That's what was going on in Thorn's mind anyways- the outward result was much less eloquent.
Tee hee, it's like he's mimicking her spazzy walk.
Anyways, after a bout of idle chatter, Thorn and Raichu settled down on the sofa as they got a bit more comfortable.
And Thorn soon took this comfort to a whole other level...
But sadly Thorn was firmly stopped in her tracks when she tried to put the lips on Rai, cause for some reason he just wasn't feeling it.
Poor Thorn. There is an explainer though...
Y'see that woman over thar on the other sofa? That's Raichu's wife, and the identikit gal in the background is his step-daughter. Ooh er.
So, now you know why Raichu rejected the lovely Thorn- he was just being a good husband. But I didn't like it! Thorn and Raichu were made for each other, literally, and it's not my fault some townie bint came along and sucked my homegrown honey into a Story Progression sham of a marriage. Shame on her!
Naturally I had to take matters into my own hands...
Sorry nameless unimportant chick- my needs are greater than yours.
Hur hur.
Err, okay- a side of my scheming that I didn't expect. I should have known Thorn would empathise with the death of Raichu's wife- she just hates to see him upset. And I hate to see Thorn upset... What have I done?!
Noooooooo Thorn stop looking at me like that! *sad face*
After the death of his wife, Raichu was naturally a bit perturbed. I mean, it's not every day some meanie overlord comes along and offs your honey is it? But still, needs must, and at least Rai had Thorn to offer him some comfort.
And he gave her some in return.
After what I'd done I thought it was only wise to keep Thorn away from Raichu for a few days- give him time to mourn and all that, but yanno Thorn and Chase just happened to visit the fire station one day and Raichu just happened to be there...
I didn't let Thorn try and smooch him or anything though- she just made sure he was okay and tried to cheer him up.
Later that day, after prising Thorn away from the fire station, the family gathered as they celebrated Bailey's birthday.
Addison decided to mark the occasion by deafening Bailey with a horn- a long-standing tradition not seen since the days of The Mars Family Legacy.
Hearing impaired, Bailey swiftly blew out her birthday candles.
And aged up.
Is anyone else thinking Austin Powers right about now?
Immediately after her transition Bailey settled down with a nice slice of cake, as you do, but sadly the other members of the family weren't able to get a piece. Nope, they were all in Glitchtown, Population: ALMOST EVERYONE.
The spazzyness of my Sims was pissing me off a treat but I decided not to let it get me down- instead choosing to focus on my one glitch-free Simmie as she worked on her logic skill.
Eventually some of the others were freed too- including Chase who promptly began to work out.
The following day marked at least 48 hours in Simland since I'd iced Raichu's wife, and as such Thorn was able to pay the hunk a visit at the fire station with some romantic pursuits in mind.
She took it slow at first- mostly just smiling at Raichu and flashing him her beautiful eyes.
But Rai was a bit more forthcoming, and he showed off his muscles as he worked the 'I'm A Firefighter' flirt.
Which Thorn liked a lot.
It had taken them longer than expected to find each other so I didn't really want to wait around when it came to Thorn and Raichu's relationship. He moved in the next day and soon eased into family life as he played tag with Blue. It's cute, but I must say- vampire super speed is so cheating.
When Raichu wasn't buddying up with the youngest Hearts, Thorn occasionally managed to get a bit of alone time with her main man, which brought about something a bit tragic...
Raichu only went and wished to have a baby with Thorn didn't he? *sad face*
I'm sorry dude- it's just not a viable option for you.
Ho well, Thorn and Rai may not be able to have bebbes, but the perks of living forever mean at least they can spend eternity together. Well, it's not exactly eternal life for Raichu, but human/Simbots don't age so Thorn will be around for a long time to come (hell, Evie from Gen 4 is still alive).
Yep, it's nice they have each other.
Multiple birthday time in the Heart household once again!
Fox was first to age.
Ummm...
Then came Blue.
You only get a sneaky-peek at her looks, cause I'm mean.
And then followed Zula. Remember Zula? Addi adopted her when she was a toddler, but unfortunately she turned out to be a right glitchy mess and as such she's spent the pretty much all of her child and teenage years trapped in once place or another.
Ah well, at least she managed to age up without any problems.
OHHHHHHHHHH BAD TIMES.
Last to take part in the birthday extravaganza was Addison, who was sadly about to age into an mouldy oldy. So not impressed!
Eh, but it could be worse I guess.
Following the party I wasted no time in shoving Zula out the front door. I like the girl and all but she stands no chance of a nice life living in Glitchtown so it really is kinder to let her go.
Byeeeeeeeeeeee!
Zula was set up with a nice apartment downtown, and not long after she'd left some of the glitchyness did seem to lift, so hurrah!
Not all of it was gone though because we were still living with the main culprit- the beauteous Thorn. However, that's not to say I noticed too much- I was too busy stalking her and Raichu.
Ohhhhhhhhhh I could just stare at them all day. I actually did for a bit- I spent a good bit of time just taking pictures of the photogenic couple.
Aren't...
...they...
...beautiful?
Mm, Thorn and Raichu really do light up my day, however... *puts on doomsday music*
This was the point when my game went a little bit tits. As you can see I suddenly experienced a bit of a taxi overload, and that's not all.
Time got FUCKED. I've experienced problems before where time freezes, but on this occasion it froze permanently, and without the hours ticking by the whole town stopped aging. Sad times.
Things were just as messed up back home- I couldn't even get Thorn and Raichu to sit next to each other without one of them spazzing out. In the end I knew there was really only one thing to do to alleviate my woes- at least as far as homelife was concerned. It was time for Thorn to leave.
Sad faces all round I know, including a heartbreaker of a look from Thorn, but it must be done. I love my human/Simbot kiddies I do but they're just so much trouble and I can't go on with things messed up like this.
So, say goodbye to Thorn and Raichu.
I MISS YOU ALREADY!!!
You can find the storyboard version here if you'd like to rec.
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